This is pornography and eroticism are ways of challenging the repressive moresOde To, a weekly column where we share the stuff we're really into in hopes that you'll be really into it, too.
Many of you have probably thrown on Netflix's delightful three-episode fireplace series, Fireplace for Your Home, to cultivate a cozy aura around the holidays.
This is a great idea -- for apartment-dwellers like myself, nothing says wintertime relaxation like a pungent, fir-scented Yankee Candle and a crackling, roaring fake fire on my television screen. It gives me a pleasant feeling of cocooned solitude, like I'm in a cabin filled with Pendleton blankets and no one can reach me by phone or email. The dream.
Lately, though, I've been trying a seasonal experiment. Right now, it's incredibly hot outside -- like, so hot as to induce panic around minute 20 of being outdoors. Then, of course, there's the news, which induces panic 100 percent of the time.
SEE ALSO: This summer, I'm bringing back the tiny fans of my youthSo why can't Fireplace for Your Home be the summertime Holy Grail of relaxation, too?
The answer, of course, is that it can. You just need to adapt it to your summertime needs.
Why can't Fireplace for Your Home be the summertime Holy Grail of relaxation, too?
Here's what you do. First, crank up your air conditioning -- as high as it can go before you start to feel anxious about next month's bill. Take it right to the brink. Then, grab a blanket. (If the A/C hasn't made your home cold, per se, a light cotton one is optimal.) Light your favorite warm-weather candle. In my case, that's the Mrs. Meyers Basil candle, because I'm a fancy bitch who still loves a deal.
Now it's time to bring Fireplace into the equation. You'll want to watch either Episode 2, which features no music, or Episode 3, featuring abrasive Muzak. (Episode 1 features Christmas music, which, unfortunately, should be avoided if you're seeking summertime relaxation.) From here, you have a little room to customize. You could crack open a beach read, or drink a glass of rosé, or wrap yourself in a terry cloth robe, or turn on all the lights and don your tiniest sunglasses. It doesn't matter!
What you should feel, if you play your cards right, is a summery kind of homeyness. It's a level of comfort you generally only experience in the winter, but one that feels appropriate for the warm weather you know awaits you outside. You know when you spend the day at the beach, then take a long shower, then swaddle yourself in blankets for an air-conditioned nap? Summertime Fireplaceis kind of like that, but just for an hour or so -- when you're sick of feeling sticky in the heat and need (deserve) a break.
Watch the fake flames flicker. Eat a tomato sandwich. Text your friends about the night's plans from underneath your blanket. It's summer, but you're still cozy! Thanks, Fireplace.
You should go back outside eventually.
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