Sadly,Watch Tasty Chicken and Sex Online there's a cap on how much pasta a person can safely ingest in one day. Thankfully, there's not a limit to how much digital pasta content a person could hypothetically consume.
The internet gives us boring internet drama, but it also graces us with infinite pasta content. The epicurean pasta content consumer needs to be selective about what goes into their feed. They can't just follow any old food Instagram or recipe blog.
They need to follow the internet's best pasta content creators.
SEE ALSO: Never cook soggy pasta again thanks to this cheap kitchen gadgetBelow is a list of some of the best places to find pasta erotica on the internet. You don't need to know how to make pasta in order to enjoy these sites. You can be someone who just enjoys the aesthetics of pasta, its global history, or how good it tastes microwaved in BPA-free Tupperware the next day.
YouTube channel Pasta Grannies features older Italian women making their original pasta recipes in their own homes. Who doesn't want to watch 95-year-old women make macaroni? The channel currently boasts over 373,000 subscribers.
Missy Robbins is considered one of New York's premiere pasta chefs and her most famous restaurant, Lilia, is one of Instagram's most premiere pasta accounts. It's not exclusively a pasta-based account, but it does feature some heavenly dishes, including this one involving mafaldini, pink peppercorn, and parmesan:
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Jane Schafer is a Cleveland-based food writer with a remarkably pretty pasta-focused Instagram account.
Look at these tidy piles of pasta. Is there anything more erotic than neatly organized pasta? It would make Marie Kondo proud.
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Miyuki Adachi is a Toronto-based pasta chef with an incredible visual eye. Adachi's pasta is like a work of art, but even better than a work of art, because it's something you can enjoy sitting down and by consuming it.
C'mon. Who doesn't want to date this pasta? It almost makes you want to commit an act of feastiality (whomp whomp).
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Put this pasta in the goddamn Whitney.
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The subreddit r/pasta might be less visual than some of the accounts featured here, but it's more of a community-based subreddit that features homemade recipes.
Look at this homemade tortellini with quail egg. It's just like grandma's homemade tortellini with quail egg:
You'll probably stop eating pasta once you start following Anthony Andiario on Instagram and realize you'll never be as good as him.
Just look at how he makes sheep's milk ricotta ravioli. Yes, I'm really good at mixing the cheese packet with my milk sauce when I make Annie's pasta, but I'll never be this talented.
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This pasta features greens and I don't even hate it.
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This is the type of Instagram account bound to make the Etsy community squeal. The taste is irrelevant. The pasta shapes and colors are that good.
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San Francisco restaurant Flour + Water is considered to be one of the best Italian restaurants in the country, and it shows on their Instagram account.
Yes, their pasta is extremely bougie but sometimes bougie people do things right, like pistchio pesto:
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Or nettle and sweetbread raviolini:
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Stop your whinin' already: I know that The Olive Garden is so much more than just pasta. It's just that the chain restaurant does pasta so well: their 'grams drip with butter and sodium and cheese, just as all 'grams should.
This, my friends, is one very sexy pasta blob:
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Admire the density of this lobster mac and cheese:
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Now excuse me while I do my favorite activity -- looking at photos of pasta while eating my weight in pasta. Consumption is a gift.
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